This came to me last week after a visit to the doctor’s. There’s an invention I really need. I thought we’d have it by now.

     No, it’s not jet packs.

     Jetpacks are the famous invention we never got. (There’s even a music group, We Were Promised Jetpacks.) Remember “The Jetsons” – everyone in the future flew around with them. Well, “The Jetsons” first aired in 1962. So where are the jetpacks? Why haven’t the guys in lab coats taken care of this?

     My invention desire is far simpler than jetpacks. A doctor was telling me one small aid for lower back pain is to remove your wallet from your hip pocket when you sit down. I’d heard that before.  Wallets are so big they throw off the body’s alignment.

     I know this is true because I once saw it in Mad magazine. Years ago, Mad did a series of cartoons on future afflictions, like oversized fingertips from all the buttons we will be pushing – and aching hips from overstuffed wallets.

     They couldn’t print that in Mad if it wasn’t true, you know.

     I pulled out my own wallet. I had only a few bills in it, plus 10 family pics (which, judging by the children’s faces, I haven’t updated since about 1998).

     It was the hard-plastic cards that were doing me in, though: driver’s license, credit card, debit card, Ukrop’s card, Barnes & Noble card, Borders card, Dick’s Sporting Goods card, Triple-A card, CVS card, Choice Hotels card, and a library card from Wilmington, N.C. (I actually had removed three local library cards a while back.)

     Even the softer, thinner cards were part of the problem: car insurance card, health insurance card, AARP card, Marriott card, Virginia Blood Services donor card, Staples Rewards card, two business cards and a Sheetz coffee card.

     Combined, these 20 cards are actually thicker than my wallet. Considerably, in fact.

     It dawned on me: I need just one card for my wallet. Just one card with coding that covers all these needs. One card that could help my aching back.

     Where is that invention? I’ve read – several times – that universal cards are coming.

     So where are they?

     Let’s get moving, lab coat guys.

What’s the invention you most want? Let us know below.

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SeeDimon   |2010-02-25 05:37:10 A Copy & Paste button on computers because most people don't have a clue how to do it. You know the ones, they send jokes and stories that you have to scroll down through the hundreds of other email addresses that were sent prior to yours to read the email.

SeeDimon   |2010-02-25 05:29:28 An automatic Zapper of cell phones in peoples hands as they are driving. It renders them useless and it's legal! :+)

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